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#536 come upstairs with me
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#536 come upstairs with me

by BATSHAPED on November 11, 2025 at 4:57 am
Characters: Mars, Pepper
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Discussion (33)

  1. Reidrev
    November 11, 2025, 5:06 am | # | Reply

    Fair point, what IS upstairs?

    • Lys19th
      November 11, 2025, 12:23 pm | # | Reply

      obviously the fan fiction I’ve been writing for the last 8 months (please don’t ask me to post it it doesn’t actually exist)

      • lemonade cats
        November 11, 2025, 5:58 pm | # | Reply

        Write it and then post it

    • Siennility
      November 11, 2025, 7:18 pm | # | Reply

      Fear

    • Viashino_wizard
      November 15, 2025, 11:36 pm | # | Reply

      The washing machine

  2. HenryH8sCops
    November 11, 2025, 5:56 am | # | Reply

    Pepper when someone else has a problem: Fuck yeah let’s talk about this in DETAIL
    Pepper when he has a problem: No time to explain please just come up stairs

  3. Clair Did Nothing Wrong
    November 11, 2025, 6:50 am | # | Reply

    This feels like the culmination of like 3 plots at once. Like Pepper said, it’s really satisfying :clair-happy:

  4. Ninjaman555555
    November 11, 2025, 7:16 am | # | Reply

    I like when the silly animals talk about sex. :pepper-cutesy:

  5. D_Voidborn
    November 11, 2025, 7:21 am | # | Reply

    Come on man, you dont just invite a girl- or someone, for that matter, upstairs without reason!

  6. Toontasm
    November 11, 2025, 8:50 am | # | Reply

    They just picked it up with their hands?? Does pepper not own a vacuum?

    Oh wait…. Dog

    • Toontasm
      November 11, 2025, 8:53 am | # | Reply

      Lol. But he should literally just tell her he developed a fear of stairs and needs her for moral support.

      But what fun would that be?

      • Fellow
        November 11, 2025, 9:08 am | # | Reply

        That wouldn’t be a smart move. Mars isn’t great at keeping secrets, and what’s Clair gonna conclude if the news about Pepper’s sudden onset stairophobia reaches her?

    • fever
      November 15, 2025, 12:06 pm | # | Reply

      oh, it would be so cute + clever if that was intentional :clair-happy:

  7. olliebot
    November 11, 2025, 10:17 am | # | Reply

    YOU DIRTY DOG! :chloe-happy:

  8. Andresins
    November 11, 2025, 10:52 am | # | Reply

    So, is the dog getting his harem the real endgame :clair-what2:

  9. Trinket
    November 11, 2025, 11:28 am | # | Reply

    YES……. YES

  10. Jarenth
    November 11, 2025, 12:21 pm | # | Reply

    Pepper’s worst enemy is now and will forever be Pepper

    • Sunroses
      November 11, 2025, 10:44 pm | # | Reply

      that pretty much sums it up yeah

    • Camilo
      November 16, 2025, 11:39 am | # | Reply

      I think that goes for pretty much everyone here.
      Except Peachy, she’s perfect.

  11. tattle
    November 11, 2025, 2:32 pm | # | Reply

    I like how the shot obscures mars’ face. she doesn’t wanna talk. and something about the balance of pepper being taller and down lower. also I just kind of like how it emphasizes mars’ shortness

  12. JGB
    November 11, 2025, 3:11 pm | # | Reply

    I hope that Pepper really opens up. Mars might be the the only person he can actually open up to with the web of unusual stuff he’s stumbled onto.

  13. Zorquil
    November 11, 2025, 4:07 pm | # | Reply

    Pepper is building up his harem trying to beat out Achilles’s autistic rizz.

    … Good luck with that!

  14. Aaa
    November 11, 2025, 4:21 pm | # | Reply

    Mars girl there are some fourth (wall) dimensional beings very interested in Pepper’s second floor so do us a favor and chaperone that dog up the stairs

  15. Phoenix
    November 11, 2025, 11:17 pm | # | Reply

    Wait, can the other members of Halo Head get injured or is it just Achilles? Correct me if I’m wrong but I don’t think we’ve seen the rest of them physically injured and they just picked up broken glass with their bare hands with no reaction. :achilles-loaf:

  16. Altruest
    November 12, 2025, 6:15 am | # | Reply

    I love how natural the dialogue is here, like of course Mars would respond with the entendre to Pepper’s request, of course pepper would get flustered and bring up Chloe, of course Mars would react negatively and of course Pepper would jump on a therapy dog opportunity. The character personalities and situations have been set up so elegantly that these conversations never feel contrived.

  17. Shadow goblin
    November 12, 2025, 6:30 am | # | Reply

    Here’s all your stupid little glass

  18. semisolidfluid
    November 12, 2025, 7:24 am | # | Reply

    guys I think he’s trying to fuck

  19. Beedle_Is_Real
    November 12, 2025, 10:31 am | # | Reply

    As of this page, the comic now has over thirty thousand words of dialogue.

    Here are the current stats.

    Total: 30,093

    1. Pepper (8259)
    2. Clair (6201)
    3. Chloe (5455)
    4. Achilles (5253)
    5. Mars (3654)
    6. Ares (842)
    7. Peachykeen (430)

    • Dominic
      November 12, 2025, 10:57 pm | # | Reply

      I saw these numbers and for whatever reason thought to myself, “man, can you imagine if these numbers were their chess elos?”

      That got me thinking of a HFHH AU where Clair runs a chess league and almost the entire cast is ridiculously good at it. In that case, their ratings and rankings could be explained as follows:

      7. :peachy-aaa: Peachy: 430
      Peachy’s only interaction with chess is being fed the chess pieces by Chloe when Clair isn’t looking. There’s a nonzero chance she sees chess as beneath her, and no room is there for folderol in the empire of Peachykeen.

      6. :steak: Ares: 842
      To be honest, I’m not even sure if Ares would play chess, let alone a chess league run by Clair (she doesn’t have to play her way anymore, so why should she?). If she did play, I’m certain her rating would skyrocket.

      5. :mars-shout: Mars: 3654
      Don’t let her lower ranking fool you; Mars is absolutely cracked at chess. The highest real-life chess elo ever achieved was Magnus Carlsen’s 2882, and Mars’s elo is nearly a thousand points higher than that. Unfortunately, her competition has a knack for reading her like a book, making it harder for her to climb the rankings.

      4. :achilles-happy: Achilles: 5253
      You know when someone is brand new to a game and manages to defeat a bunch of pros with never-before-seen strategies, despite not having a complete grasp on the rules of the game? That’s 100% Achilles. He’s still learning the ropes of chess, but his unique approach and fresh outlook gives all of his opponents a tough time, even those ranked way above him.

      3. :chloe-say: Chloe: 5455
      The underdog who recently surpassed Achilles in the rankings, Chloe started her chess career by straight up cheating (someone’s gotta feed Peachy those pieces, right?), but she slowly started warming up to the game. Sooner or later, she realizes that she actually likes chess, but like hell if she’s gonna let anyone else know that! She starts practicing in secret and gets really, REALLY good at the game. She still brings Peachy along to maintain the facade of her cheating, but make no mistake: her climb towards the top 3 was legitimate.

      2. :clair-what2: Clair: 6201
      I don’t think there’s a single universe out there where Clair ISN’T a god at chess. She’s studied all the high-level strategies and played thousands upon thousands of games to get where she is today. By all accounts, she has the makings of a champion. The only thing holding her back is her over-reliance on the by-the-book strategies she’s learned. Her unwillingness to improvise and try different approaches when things go wrong ultimately prevents her from taking the top spot from the current champion…

      1. :pepper-cutesy: Pepper: 8259
      Pepper is roughly on par with Clair in terms of being well-read on high-level chess – if anything, Clair might still have the advantage in that regard. Where Pepper shines is ability to change his strategy based on his opponent’s approach. If Clair is a very methodical player, then Pepper is a very observant player, absorbing every aspect of his opponent’s gameplan, including their weak spots. It’s this approach that ultimately lands him this spot as the reigning chess champion of Halo Head – though for how long has yet to be seen.

  20. HKC
    November 14, 2025, 2:31 pm | # | Reply

    Aaaah pero que hay arribaaa :mars-shout:

  21. SheepishLaurie
    November 14, 2025, 10:52 pm | # | Reply

    PEPPER YOURE NOT SUPPOSED TO EXPOSE YOURSELF LIKE THAT :pepper-shoot:

    Also Pepper questionable behaviour rears its head as he tries to use someone else’s problem to his advantage

  22. OpossumParty
    November 16, 2025, 12:49 am | # | Reply

    It’s where Pepper keeps his eyes when he knows his bangs aren’t gonna get lifted.

  23. AchillesEnjoyer
    November 16, 2025, 5:11 pm | # | Reply

    I can totally see the next comic being him dragging her upstairs and then just breaking down after making it to the top. I feel like seeing pepper like that would shock even mars. maybe this is when he spills a little to her about The Stairs

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